Hellboy |
Van Helsing |
| Basic Formula |
|
The Thing + Bruce Willis
|
League Of Extraordinary Gentlemen + Blade
|
| Source Material |
|
Indie comic few knew about
|
Oldie movies few cared about
|
| Peculiar Head Accoutrement |
|
Goggle-like shorn horns
|
Hat stolen from Vampire Hunter D
|
| Weapons of Freudian Overcompensation Issues |
|
All loud and grossly oversized
|
Edgy and chrome plated
|
| Bland Brunette Eye Candy |
|
Selma Blair
|
Kate Beckinsale
|
| Previous Animal Form |
|
The Beast
|
Wolverine
|
| Freakish Sidekick |
|
Niles Crane From The Black Lagoon
|
Faramir from Lord Of The Rings
|
| Nemesis With Funny Accent |
|
A dickless Rasputin
|
The Duke from Moulin Rouge
|
| Evillainess(es) |
|
Nazi-lla with a haircut like a boy, but swings a sledgehammer like a man
|
Flying Maxim centerfolds with overbites
|
| Movie's CGI Monsters |
|
Stunt doubles in the live-action La Blue Girl
|
Ported from the tie-in game
|
| Surprise! |
|
A clockwork nazi ninja zombie!
|
People in the audience who came on purpose!
|
| Director's previous grievous offenses |
|
Guillermo Del Toro, of Blade 2 & Mimic
|
Stephen Somers, of The Mummy & The Mummy Returns
|
| Good News |
|
A confirmed sequel
|
Keanu Reeves' Constantine may yet suck more than this
|
