Lemurs Rock!

Lemur rhymes with creamer.

Having known Matt the duration of his 20's, I thought I should reflect on his accomplishments of the past decade as he heads into his 30's.

Matt managed to get through the bulk of the past 10 years avoiding any leafy green food-type. He also subsisted on a diet comprised 56% of Little Pizza King. Despite this, Matt has successfully dodged scurvy and still manages to wear his same pant size from high school. I hear Roger Clemens was the same way until he turned 30.

Three Tenths of a Century Old
Except for a brief 14 month stint or so, Matt has managed to stay in school the last 10 years -- and he's still going.

Top Ten Items on Matt's 30th Birthday Wish List

Encino Man on DVD An original Tenderheart Carebear (Oh wait, he already HAS that) To win a game of Chickenfoot For Jay, Tastes-Like-Burning Staff Writer, to whistle the entire collection of Enya to him live To see Samus DIE! The chance to push Omar Visquel into the Springfield Mystery Spot A fifth Legends of Backgammon Championship Book on tape of Shakespeare's Hamlet read by Keanu Reeves A World Series Title for the Red Sox An all-expensed paid trip to the Martin VanBuren Historical Museum

It is my theory that he is actually trying to reverse time as he approaches 30 by inverting the natural path of a person in their 20's. Matt has become less gainfully employed and attended more school as his age increases. I suspect by the time he is 40, he will no longer be coloring inside the lines, and will require a sippy-cup of apple juice before his nap. However, between his hectic schedule of sleeping in and watching cartoons, he has produced some wonderful pieces of writing, and taught some college kids a thing or two about poetry and the Yankees sucking.

Despite Matt's aversion to veggies and employment, I can think of no better person for my daughter's Godfather. There is a goodness and wisdom lacking in most that is personified in my good friend. Here's to another decade of putting up with yours truly. HAPPY 3-0 MATT!