Steam on the Big Screen
With the release of the fifth Potter book, it's time to look at the other part of the franchise, and the upcoming third film, The Prisoner of Azkaban, due for release June 4, 2004.

There are changes with this film, and not just Harry and Ron's voices, although the actors and characters will be a year older, wiser, and taller.

Perhaps the biggest surprise came with last year's announcement that Chris Columbus would give up his director's chair (to spend more time with his own kids) and that it would be filled not with another favorite American, Hollywood kid's moviemaker (was Ron Howard busy?), but with Alfonso Cuarón.

Does his name ring a bell? Well maybe you remember his Ethan Hawke version of Great Expectations. Or his award winning A Little Princess. Both can be considered family fare. Or maybe you heard about the last film he made. It was acclaimed as a new beginning for modern Mexican moviemaking, and reviled for it's explicit and incredibly realistic, sometimes awkward, sex scenes.

Y Tu Mamá También (And Your Mother, Too) is incredible cinema, telling the story of teenagers Tenoch and Julio and the older woman, Luisa, who they convince to join them on a trip to the beach. But it's about much more than that.

As Roger Ebert puts it, "It is about the fragility of life and the finality of death. Beneath the carefree road movie that the movie is happy to advertise is a more serious level--and below that, a dead serious level." Substitute "story of magic and friendship" for "road movie" and you have an apt description of J.K. Rowling's creation.

The dynamics of the trios are remarkably similar. Tenoch and Harry are both very comfortable financially, and have many of the possessions that working-class Julio and Ron would like to afford. Both friendships are solid, but are tested by disagreements and potential acts of betrayal.

Hermione and Luisa are both along for the ride, but clearly become impatient with their boys for not taking themselves and their situation more seriously. Luisa attempts to teach Julio and Tenoch about love and sex and friendship. Hermione wants to get Ron and Harry to take better notes and work harder in their classes, and to be more aware of the dangers around them.

The question is whether Cuarón can go from scenes of two teenage boys whacking off in unison on parallel diving boards as they discover their sexuality and their place in modern, class-torn Mexico, to fancy-free images of students eating Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans and studying for a charms exam.

I think it will be thrilling if Cuarón can combine elements of both films. God forbid anyone suggest that Harry, Ron and Hermione end up in a drunken threesome (is nothing sacred?), but PofA is a far darker story than the past two movies, and the wizards' understanding of the world around them is slowly growing. Soul-sucking Dementors haunt the campus, causing Harry to have flashbacks of the murdering of his parents, and another murderer is on the loose and reportedly headed straight for him. If Cuarón can work the plight of Mexican peasants into a coming-of-age story and still make it flow and sizzle on screen, surely a few house elves won't slow him down.

Then again, not that I want to soil my treasured characters, but I have to wonder. Going back to that drunken threesome, imagine for a moment what Cuarón could do with a slightly older cast, and perhaps an R rating...

Y Tu Hermione Tambien
It's late at night. Harry, Ron and Hermione have stolen away from Hogwarts using the invisibility cloak and are headed to Hogsmeade for a little fun. As they run through the dark tunnels, their bodies are close together and they bump and giggle and trip over one another, already drunk with the freedom of getting away from school and responsibility.

The three tumble into the Three Broomsticks and order a round of butterbeers. With mischief in her eyes, Hermione begins to ask Harry about Katie Bell.

"I see the way you look at her, Harry. So how are you going to make your move on her? Maybe bump into her in the Quidditch locker room and 'disarm' her?" she suggested.

Harry just blushed.

"What are you talking about?" Ron asked. "Why would Harry need to bump into Katie Bell? He can see her at Quidditch practice any time."

"Oh Ron, don't be naive," Hermione sighed. "Girls want to be pursued, we want to be taken. Haven't Fred and George taught you anything?"

"Not about girls," Ron said, disgustedly. "Why would I want to bother with them?"

"Hermione's a girl, if you haven't noticed," Harry chuckled, thinking of the scowl on Ron's face two days earlier when Dean Thomas had offered to help Hermione with her pile of schoolbooks and rolls of parchment. He had kidded Ron about it later that day in the Gryffindor showers, after the two had raced from the edge of the Forbidden Forest to the Greenhouse and back. Harry always won. But Ron insisted that he was only upset that Dean was trying to show off his levitation charm with his large wand, and couldn't care less how much it seemed to please Hermione.

"Yeah, I know," Ron stumbled, "But, I mean, it's just, ugh."

"You know Ron, you might feel differently someday," Hermione said with raised eyebrows, as her hand slid closer to his open robe, and finally rested on his knee. Ron turned red, then blanched, as blood rushed from one end of his body to the other.

Ron thought back to before his first Quidditch game as the Gryffindor keeper. Hermione has planted a quick kiss on his cheek, stopping him dead in his tracks. He knew she was just being a good friend, trying to wish him luck, but he'd played horribly for the next few games, imagining her watching him from the stands, and remembering how her lips had felt on his skin, wondering how she would feel close to his own lips. He didn't have a clue what to do next.

Harry went up and fetched another round of butterbeers and brought them back to the table, where Ron and Hermione were still staring at one another, a small smile beginning to form on Ron's nervously chewed lips. "I think we need some music," Hermione suggested. She walked over to the large shell-shaped speaker by the bar, tapped twice with her wand, and the new White Lightening single came on, "Fell in Love With a Witch."

Hermione had been patient with Ron Weasley for years, going on dates with other boys to make him jealous, giving him subtle hints about how to ask a girl out, clearly being more affectionate with him than with Harry. Still, he seemed blind to the fact that she fancied him, and her frustration often made her snap at him. To make matters worse, Padma Patil had been extra friendly with Ron ever since he took her to that Ball. Of course, he hadn't noticed that either. Sometimes his cluelessness worked to her benefit.

With another stroke of her wand, Hermione had both of the boys on their feet, although neither of them seemed to know that they were standing up as they watched her black school robes turn red, with a black lace trim.

The three danced together to the music, unaware of anyone else in the tavern. Ron slowly took command of his own feet, and then his hands, and tentatively put them on Hermione's waist. She responded by reaching her hand up and tousling his soft red hair, using her other hand to see what Harry would look like without his perpetually cracked glasses.

Harry felt as though he were in the way, and yet he couldn't bear to leave his two best friends, and they didn't seem to want him to leave. If anything, Ron seemed to panic a bit if Harry moved even slightly away. Clearly, he was nervous at the idea of being alone with Hermione, although she seemed well in control of the situation. The butterbeer warmed Harry from the inside out, leaving him feeling relaxed and a little dreamy. He let his chin rest on the top of Hermione's head and saw Ron flush as he moved closer to her as well.

Moments later, the three shared a look, pulses racing, and quickly gathered their things to dash back to the tunnel, hand in hand in hand...

This article is part of Newmoanyeah's Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix Week.